This friend Blaine Tuft  is now a medical doctor who has been deployed to Afghanistan.  With permission from Blaine,  I share with you verbatim a section of his letter.

“Last night was a sad, memorable night for me.  We had a 12-year-old girl brought in after she picked up a mine (while she was  out in the fields with her livestock).

It blew off both  her hands and completely blew her eye out of the socket.

When she finally got to us we had to tell the father that she had catastrophic brain injuries and would not survive.  The father was very stoic and did not cry.  We withdrew care and she passed quietly.   The father said some Muslim prayers and recited scriptures over her.   We then had one of the women clean the body and turner her face East towards Mecca, as per their customs.

I tried to show compassion to the father and sat down by him in a chair and touched his shoulder to express my condolences at which point he literally jumped out of his chair.  I don’t know if he was surprised or he thought I was asking him to move. I guess our expressions are not the same as theirs.

This morning when I came back into work he was sitting outside the doctors work room–no sleep all night, wiping away tears…through a translator I asked him if I could bring him something to eat…he said “no”.  He just wanted to leave to take the body back home.

The mortality rates are extremely high in the country especially with childbirth but death of a loved one inflicts horrible wounds regardless of the country or circumstances.

I dreamt of Michaela last night and woke up feeling very somber.”

I frequently make the comment to team members,  partners, and individuals aspiring to become entrepreneurs the same comment that my mentor Dr. Peter Horne made to me.

You can replace anything in this world.  You can replace a job, you can replace a car, you can replace money. What you can never replace is your family, your trust relationships, and your health.

Let us not forget why we embark in this amazing adventure of entrepreneurship and do it with intent to deepen not diminish the precious trust relationships in our lives.

Want to really focus your team and get amazing results?

Set a really big goal and then form a Catalyzing Statement around this goal.

Catalyzing statements hook people emotionally and are the driver that propels individuals towards a challenging goal.

About a month ago I heard  Rick Sapio give several examples.   I would like to share his and then give a fun one that I ran across in Japan this week.

Fed Ex – When It Absolutely Positively Has To Be There Overnight —  If you want a GREAT laugh, watch this FedEx Commercial
Microsoft Bill Gates – I picture a world with a PC  on every desktop and in every home – 1975
President Kennedy – We will put a man on the moon and return him safely to earth before the end of the century.

These catalyzing statements go FAR beyond placing a goal. They emotionally charge us and align us. They emotionally allow us to seek and believe and go forward.

A good example of this is Bill Gates. Prior to making the  unifying statement the goal was clearly set to have Microsoft be the largest software company in the world. Great goal, but where is the emotion and the emotional buy in.  It came when he stated  ” I picture a world with a PC on every desk and in every home.” That inspired us, we visualized this and indeed it enabled the goal.

This past week I have been in Asia. I was able to spend a bit of time in Japan and visited a company in Tokyo called Fujita. From the instant I entered this business I knew it was different. The tone, the conduct of the staff, and the presentation of the board room was simply different. They were focused and clearly were on a mission.  There was not the usual motion that I frequently experience in Japan.   Indeed the meeting I had was successful and at the end of the communication I could not help but poke a bit. I asked the individual I was meeting with to explain more about the company, the founder, and the history. His answer gave it all away. With out a second of hesitation here was his response:

“Fujita’s vision is to bring American culture to Japan”.

Wow, now that is powerful.  That is a hairy, big, audacious, and crazy goal.   “Bring American culture to Japan!”

You see they are not in the hamburger or movie business.  They are not selling clothing. They are not in the import / export business. Those things are simply vehicles.

They are going to change Japan from eating sushi to Big Macs, and guess what…they did.

What I did not tell you earlier is Fujita’s founder  Den Fujita is responsible for bringing McDonalds to Japan. He was also responsible for bringing Toys R Us and BlockBuster to Japan.

As I have considered this, I realized that this type of statement not only motivates us and inspires us, but also allows the company to change and extract us from the weeds when necessary.

Next time you set a big goal, create a catalyzing statement!   Hang on because it will rock your world with what happens if done properly.

In 1989 I helped make my first $2MM business mistake.  I keep this box on my life-trophy shelf to remind me never to make this mistake again.

So what was it we did?

Rich Christiansen $2MM Channel Lesson

We did what so many eager engineering types do–we built a way cool, exciting,  leading-edge technology (digital power line transmission) and then tried to sell it.

We just knew the customers would buy these by the bucket loads.  We would go to the trade shows and got mobbed, so certainly this was going to be a barn burner. Everyone told us we were so smart and this was the coooooolest technology ever.

NOT! Cool technology does not necessarily mean purchasing customers. In 1990 the company went belly up!

I would rather have purchasing customers and profit than some cool little box sitting on my shelf reminding me not to be stupid again.

Better to sell it first and build it second, than to build it first and then try to sell it.

Today I did a BootStrap Business lecture at an Entrepreneurial Launch Pad event.

I love meeting with eager individuals who are on those tender first steps of venturing out into the brave cold and exciting world of creating a business.   However, there is one thing that makes me want to scream every time I see it and indeed I saw it today.

Make sure someone is going to buy it before you build it.

Its All about the channel!

Build It and they will come…NOT!

Save yourself a couple of million $ and let my box be the reminder. Don’t build your own.

Before Brett had turned 16, he’d already won several southern Utah golf tournaments. In high school he was elected student body president, set a State record in the 400-yard dash, and graduated as valedictorian of his class with a perfect 4.0. All of these achievements acted as a springboard for an exacting college experience. Brett attended Brigham Young University in pre-med, focusing on a degree in engineering
design technology while also working a full-time job. University advisors counseled him that in order to make it into med school, not only would he need to quit his job, but also change major tracks. For med school, his program was GPA suicide. But Brett had a vision and a personal “secret formula” for success.

Long story short, Brett graduated with high honors from the DET program, completed his graduate work at Columbia Medical Center, and went to Johns Hopkins where he was selected as head resident in his final year. He was also highlighted in episode six of ABC’s Hopkins 24/7, was highlighted as a feature story on the Oprah Winfrey Show, and on and on and on. What does all this have to do with you and entrepreneurship? It’s Brett’s “secret formula”:  Do the Hard Thing.

One evening over dinner, I pressed Brett on the substance behind this mantra. He responded: “Most people are like water; they take the path of least resistance. They look for short cuts or have the mindset of ‘Can I get by with doing less?’ As soon as you decide to do the hard things, you’ve achieved two victories: you’ve eliminated 98 percent of your competition (they’re off doing the easy things) and you’ve set yourself apart, differentiated yourself, and made yourself unique.”

Ron penned the following verse, and I think it sums up the chapter well:

“Stars were not scattered ‘cross the midnight sky
To only be seen by the longing eye.
Stars were scattered above the land
To be grasped and held by the longing hand.”

One of my favorite sayings comes from an entrepreneur in insurance and real estate about eight decades ago. Named Spencer W. Kimball, he later became a prominent religious leader in the 1970s and 1980s. He said, “Do it, do it now, and do it with a purpose. Make no small plans, for it has not the magic to stir the soul of man.” Make no small plans! Whoever you think you are, you must know this: you are not wired to accept failure. You are not wired to stay down. You are wired to get up and go forward. You are wired for greatness! What is your star? Can you see it? Can you visualize it? Your willingness to do the hard thing will allow you to grasp and hold onto your star.

Porter’s Points – Do the Hard Thing

• Analyze what is in your heart and in your head. You must be willing to do the work and balance the sacrifices.
• Make a list of what you bring to the table.
• Don’t pick the path of least resistance. Differentiate yourself. Make yourself unique.
• Doing the hard thing will set you apart from most of your competition. Your unalterable determination will propel you beyond the rest.
• Make big plans! Visualize your star and go after it!
• Your mental attitude must be a “Can do!” attitude.

I remember when Eddy Anderson joined my team at Novell. We traveled together to the UK to present to a client, Santa Cruz Operations. Eddy had put in weeks of hard work and forethought, and even prepared a software bundle as part of his presentation. As he began to speak, I felt the energy pick up in the room, and saw the board members nodding their heads in agreement. He was perfectly polished and charismatic. As he left the conference room everyone commented on how impressed they were with his high-quality work. He had hit a home run. He was in The Zone!

Obviously, you can’t live your entire life in The Zone. Most of life will actually be spent setting the zone up, just like Ed did with his weeks of preparation. You have to pay for success up front. So go get ideas, do some research, make a plan, and practice, practice, practice! After you’ve gone through the process, however, you must learn to let all of it go and trust your preparation. You simply need to enter your zone and perform.

There are two kinds of work: hard work, the kind that requires all of your focus and amazing amounts of energy, and zone work, the kind of work that leaves you feeling exhilarated and energized. Zone work usually follows hard work.

The feelings you experience in the zone will sustain you in critical moments. If you let it, your zone will always be in the background as motivation. You will crave that energy and that fulfillment. The thing is, the more you experience The Zone, the more your confidence will
grow! Your performances will improve, and you will be able to enter it at will. Getting into their zones is why people love their work.

A few years ago, in the foyer of Thanksgiving Point Golf Course, there stood a glass case that housed a short iron used by the golf great Johnny Miller. He must have used it for years, because on the middle of the club face there was an indention about half an inch deep. It came as the result of tens of thousands of golf balls being hit in the same spot on that club face over and over and over again. Clearly, Johnny found the sweet spot with that club and once he found it, he made the most of it—it was one of the clubs he used to win the 1973 U.S. Open at Oakmont. The lesson here? Get the most out of your passions and talents, and don’t let up!

Porter’s Points – The Zone

• Prepare. Make sure that when you arrive for the performance, you’ve put in the time and sweat necessary to feel confident and competent.
• Don’t feel intimidated by clients. Big name or not, they’re asking for what you have to offer. Fear damages your ability to get in The Zone.
• Have faith in your skills and the value of your smart, focused work.
• Keep a mental image of the last time you were in The Zone. Vividly remember the excitement your felt—you can experience it again.

A few years ago I enjoyed a great partnership with Curtis Blair. We were expanding a company called Cyclone Trading Co., an international golf supply business. One day while we were working together, Curtis confided in me one of his personal mental barriers in golf. For years he had told himself he was not a sub-80 golfer. He was certain that if he took private lessons and had plenty of practice time, got his hip rotation right, and ensured his mechanics were fluid he could maybe, just maybe, go sub-80 in three or four years. For Curtis, the solution was “work harder.” I didn’t buy it. I saw his talent. I saw this predicament as a perfect opportunity to show Curtis what he could do for himself with regard to both his game and his business attitudes: he just needed to break though mental barriers.

To spur him along, I issued an offer and a challenge: “Curtis, I’m going to prove to you that you are a sub-80 golfer. Not only will I do that, I will personally reward you for achieving your goal.”

The plan laid out was simple and far from original:  “You must visualize success on every shot. You must play one and only one shot at a time. You must decide whether your putt is a ‘get it close’ or a ‘make it in’ putt. You must focus on playing confidently but conservatively. The next few times we play I’ll walk you through each shot: club selection and positive reinforcement exercises. Finally, if you want the reward
you must hit in the 70s within three months, not three years.”

“You’re on,” Curtis agreed.

Three months later Curtis and I stood on the 18th hole of the Coral Canyon Golf Course near St. George, Utah. The previous evening had been spent putting for two hours, talking about mindset, practicing layups and up-and-down shots. After that, we ended with
a relaxing dinner – nothing stressful, just having fun. Now it was the next day, standing on the tee box at the 18th.

Curtis teed up and ripped off a smooth drive. The Pro-V1 bounced three times and rolled to the left center of the fairway. Pulling out a three iron he went through the same routine, but the ball sliced, ending up in the weeds. His wedge from the weeds got him within 10 feet of the flag for a chance at par. He pushed the putt, sliding it past the cup by three feet—no better than a bogey chance now. And then the moment arrived: an easy tap-in gave him a bogey. “Seventy-seven!” I shouted.

I knew all along that Curtis would do it, so I was not surprised. The win came because Curtis broke through his mental barrier. Standing on the 18th hole that day, Curtis discovered exactly what he was capable of: anything.

Porter’s Points – Breaking Through the Mental Barrier

• Do not allow mental barriers to keep you from succeeding.
• Visualize your success, paint the picture of where you want to be and then be the painting!
• Don’t sell yourself short by believing your success requires a long, drawn-out process. With the right tools and mental attitude, success may be closer than you think.

An entrepreneur with an abundance mentality has the ability to recognize opportunities. Look out your window. Do you see $100 bills lying in the streets, just waiting for you to pick them up? They are out there; you simply need to learn to see them.

Benjamin Franklin often quoted the old saying “A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush.” To a certain extent, this is true. It’s better to have something than to have nothing at all. But here’s the thing: the world is absolutely brimming with bushes, and those bushes are bursting with birds! How did you get that bird in your hand in the first place? Can you do it again?

Remember that old Ben also said, “He that would fish must venture his bait.” Surely there’s a balance that needs to be found. I recall a young man who asked me to lunch to discuss an idea of his. He was sure it would change the world. The only problem was that he clutched onto the idea so tightly, so afraid of losing it or having it stolen by someone else, that he shared it with no one. As a result, this young man will likely take “the idea of the century” to the grave with him. He suffers from the opposite of abundance mentality: scarcity mentality.

Scarcity mentality causes people to cling tightly to their “bird in the hand” because they fear being left with nothing at all. This mentality results in individuals distrusting any or all who would be their partners and collaborators. They fear jeopardizing the “great idea.”

On the other hand, an abundance mentality allows you to plan and dream, work with others, and have faith that there are more opportunities out there than you know. Not only does this mindset allow you to relax and see things for what they are, it’s a lot more enjoyable!

When Ron and I began partnering on our business Ron was living the scarcity model. He had just been through a layoff and was focused on the risk rather than the opportunity. For me, it was different: everywhere I turned there was an abundance of prospects, just waiting to be plucked from the bushes. As the year went on, we did a flip-flop! Ron had learned to trust my abundance mentality, and in doing so, began to see and trust the opportunities himself. I had been through a tough year. After a soured partnership, I went into survival mode.

As you maneuver your way through business ventures, you may fluctuate between abundance and scarcity mentalities. Learn the warning signs, and be able to take applicable action to ensure your happiness, sanity, and success.

The Warning Signs

• You are paranoid that partners, outsourced workers, or the UPS guy might steal your great idea.
• Instead of surveying the situation and reacting accordingly, you find yourself sticking to an original plan, regardless of how things have changed.
• You are reluctant to expand, add new people, or make choices that will require you to branch out of your comfort zone.
• You buy antacids in bulk.
• In the back of your mind, you feel like any success you’re experiencing could end at any moment, so you’re constantly on guard.

Does that sound like you? If so, you need a course correction!

Porter’s Points—Abundance Mentality

• Spring for the office lunch or buy some Girl Scout cookies when your partner’s daughter comes around collecting orders. It’s good for the soul, and reminds you that things are not as tight as they may appear.
• You are the driving force behind your idea. Without your passion, it wouldn’t be the same. Take the right steps to protect your intellectual property and get going!
• Bend in response to new opportunities or setbacks. A small business’s agility is its trump card: large corporations don’t have that luxury.
• Give! Philanthropy is the surest way to release you from unnecessary panic. Giving is a surefire cure for scarcity mentality.

If you expect success, everything you do translates into success—even your failures. If you expect failure, everything you do translates into failures—even your successes. If you expect to be loved, you will be loved; and if you expect to be taken advantage of you will be taken advantage of. Life is a self-fulfilling prophecy.

This concept seems to be popping up everywhere lately.  I attempted to trace it back to its origin, the law of attraction. I found it in Buddhism, Confucianism, in the philosophy and psychology of William James, and the 2006 bestseller called The Secret by Rhonda Byrne.

My conclusion: this truth resonates throughout time and applies to our lives today.  We all know people who seem to get all the breaks: the woman down the street who wins all the beauty contests, the guy in the office across the hallway whose putts always fall. Everything they touch turns platinum.

Contrastingly, you likely know people who fill the casting call for the “Eeyores” of life.  You’re not sure whether to pity them or appreciate how sparkling your personality seems in comparison. They have low expectations and their mood persistently commiserates with the dismal, melancholy little rain cloud that seems to hover over them everywhere they go.

What made them this way? Luck of the draw? Lightning bolts on the equator? The truth is it’s no accident. It doesn’t just happen. They’ve expected nothing less, or more precisely, nothing more! They have used their will to make it so.

I don’t watch a lot of television, but on more than one occasion I’ve come home to find my wife queuing up the TIVO and commanding me to sit down and watch Oprah. I’ve witnessed, from a distance, Oprah’s amazing ability to live this principle. From my perspective, she chose to expect the best from life. She chose to love. She chose to succeed. She chose to forgive. She will get everything from life she expects. And if you think she has fulfilled her expectations by now, my bet is that you’re very wrong. I conclude that Oprah expects more great things of herself and the world she lives in and loves, and always will.

Golfing great Jack Nicklaus seemed to convey genuine surprise every time he missed a shot. He literally expected each and every shot to be a winner. He knew what he could do, and did not waste time timidly hoping the putt might fall.

Decide what you want out of life! Write your expectations down. Call them goals, call them resolutions, call them whatever you want. Get your dreams down on paper, write them in your heart. Believe you will achieve them and go after them.

Viktor Frankl, survivor of the horrors that took place in Auschwitz and Dachau under a Nazi regime, wrote a book called “Man’s Search for Meaning.” This book is required reading for my team. In the midst of the worst possible scenarios he chose to expect the most out of life. His works kept him alive to become a paragon of this principle.  “We can’t always choose what happens to us but we can choose how to respond to what happens to us. It is our ultimate and final freedom. I had wanted simply to convey to the reader by way of concrete example that life holds a potential meaning under any conditions, even the most miserable ones. And I thought that if the point were demonstrated in a situation as extreme as that in a concentration camp, my book might gain a hearing. I therefore felt responsible for writing down what I had gone through, for I thought it might be helpful to people who are prone to despair.”  (Frankl, Viktor E. “Man’s Search for Meaning”)

I add my humble but zealous voice to those who have, do, and will yet live life against the backdrop of this truth: life gives you what you expect it to.

Porter’s Points – The Secret

• Internalize this truth: Life really does give you what you expect it to.
• Employ your will to make your success a reality.
• It is not enough to just dream about what your success looks like. Exert the discipline required to achieve your dream.

Ron and I have a dear friend named Roger Reid who exemplifies the type of mindset and attitude necessary to thrive in times of turbulence. Roger was one of the most successful college basketball coaches in the United States during the 1990s. In 1996 Roger was involved in a nasty termination from a major university. After the termination, I stopped by his home to express my support. We talked for a while and after a bit he stated with a knowing smile, “I have finally found out how funny my jokes really are.”  Chuckling, he continued: “Before this experience everyone always laughed at my jokes. Now people only laugh when I’m actually funny.”

You will have times of turbulence as you build your business. Determine now how you will respond. Will you transform your failure into a step toward success?  Will your failures provide you an opportunity to gutcheck your jokes? Roger went on to achieve multiple successes in his chosen field. Roger Reid is wired for success. So are you.

Does failure break your heart? I sincerely hope not.  Reality dictates that you will experience failures as you start a business. Many of my most valued experiences have been my biggest failures, resulting in my biggest opportunities to learn and change. One of my favorite sayings is:

A stupid man never learns from his mistakes.

A smart man always learns from his mistakes.

A wise man learns from others’ mistakes.

As you shift into this mindset, you will learn to embrace failure and realize that it is part of the process. I have observed that great entrepreneurs seem to handle failure in a calm, competent, and confident manner.  Become passionate about understanding your failures.  It is the only way that you will learn from your mistakes and progress beyond them.

Thomas Edison failed hundreds of times before creating a filament for the light bulb. Despite the rough beginnings, he refused to become discouraged or view anything as a failure: “Every wrong attempt discarded is a step forward.”

One of my favorite sayings is: “Competence or incompetence always shows its head. It may take a day, a month, a year, maybe even 10 years or longer, but sooner or later it will show its head.” If you are competent, a failure is nothing more than a turn in your journey’s road, a step forward. It can actually make the process more exciting. You just have to refuse to allow your negative thoughts or naysayers to convince you that a setback or even a series of setbacks constitutes incompetence and marks you a failure.

Years ago I heard a story from one of my peers about a seminar where the speaker used an object lesson to illustrate this principle. He took a $100 dollar bill out of his pocket and asked the audience:

“Who wants this?”

Every hand shot up. He proceeded to crumple the $100 in a small ball and asked again,

“Who wants it now?”

Again, every hand shot up. He took the C-note and threw it on the floor and began jumping up and down on it.

“Who wants it now?”

Once more, all hands were in the air. Then came the real gem:

“You mean after I’ve crumpled it, jumped on it, and literally beat it up, you still want it? Why?”

One of the participants volunteered the answer.  “Because its value has not changed!”

So it is with you. You will get beat up, you will fail. But your value does not change. It doesn’t diminish. In fact, the rough treatment will actually increase your value!  There is definitely value in having a selective memory when you are an entrepreneur. Mark Twain captured the feeling: “The inability to forget is infinitely more devastating than the inability to remember.” Do not linger on the bad experiences. Take stock of where you are and appreciate how you got there.

Starting a business is not like baseball where it’s three strikes and you’re out. If you set it up properly, you can take as many pitches as you like and all that really matters is eventually getting the bat to connect firmly with the ball. It doesn’t matter if it takes one pitch or twenty. Just keep at it. Tweak your swing, change your grip, try a lighter bat, or move up in the batter’s box.  You will find the right combination and sooner or later you will connect.

Frequently as I gather with my entrepreneur buddies, our banter turns to battle scars. Near-death stories are told with relish and pride. They are badges of honor. Why? Because the journey, the failures, the experiences, and the lessons learned are the fun parts!

Porter’s Points – Embracing Failure

• Learn to enjoy, embrace, and savor your failures.
• Don’t be too hard on yourself, you can’t gain experience without failure—it’s a natural cycle.
• Keep a journal of critical decisions and how they turned out. Write advice to yourself to follow in similar, future situations.

Great leaders are often required to stand alone. They must make difficult decisions and stand by them, sometimes facing immense opposition. Many business owners confuse popularity with good leadership. In truth, as you learn to make the hard choices and have the courage to follow through, popularity may be one of the first things you sacrifice.

Do you remember your most inspirational teacher?  I do: Coach Tuft. He was tough! Coach Tuft taught with a unique structure and approach, and always expected significant effort for the results he expected.

He may not have been the most popular, but he truly exemplified great leadership. Coach Tuft was honest, straightforward, demanding, and cared enough to give me relevant and, at times, piercing feedback. He held me to a higher standard than I ever dreamed of holding myself to.

But don’t be such a strict taskmaster that you make enemies at every turn. My mentor, Dr. Peter Horne, told me something very important: “Be nice to the people on the way up because you’re going to see them again on the way down.”

What about your easiest teacher? Remember her or his name? I can’t! I do, however, remember his face, and the shenanigans I used to pull in class from time to time.  The same principle holds true as you lead. Leaders need to be honest, straightforward, and able to elicit an individual’s best work far more than they need to be popular.

Consider an example found closer to home. What happens when parents attempt to win popularity contests in an effort to be best buddies with their kids?  Anarchy! Children want and need their parents to set boundaries, provide structure, and elicit excellence.  They neither need nor want parents to win popularity contests, even on their grumpiest of days.

The same is true of a business leader. A strong front may leave you out of the fun lunches from time to time, but know that the line you are guarding is an important one. The success of your business hinges on your ability to motivate and inspire, not your ability to make your team laugh at the Friday afternoon get togethers.

One of the greatest leaders to walk the earth did so two thousand years ago. His life exuded loneliness from birth to death. This is how Jesus Christ expressed his understanding of this principle: “The foxes have holes, and the birds of the air have nests; but the Son of man hath not where to lay his head.”  Bible (King James Version). Matthew 8:20.

Porter’s Points – Loneliness of Leadership

• Do not fear to stand alone. Popularity does not make a great leader.
• Hold yourself to a higher standard.
• Set high standards for your team in order to elicit each individual’s best work.